Jealousy.

It's a common thing. Everybody gets jealous at one point of another. It might not be one of those movie-type jealous where some dude goes around hating everybody and kills people. It those petty pangs of jealousy where you're like: "Damn, I wish I had that" or "I want to do that". So, because I can't think of anything else, here is a list of Petty Pangs of Jealousy.

• I am jealous of guys who can cook. Or any woman who can cook. I wish I could. That is so useful, makes me independent. Also, apparently you can get the ladies if you know how to cook.
  
• I am jealous of guys who can breakdance/pop 'n' lock. Or any woman who can breakdance and/or pop 'n' lock. It looks so cool. The photo on Sandra's Tumblr made me even more jealous. How cool does THAT look! It's awesome and romantic, at the same time. It takes skill. It also gets the ladies.
• I am jealous of guys who can sing. Or any woman who can sing. Singing is a skill for life. It impresses everybody, including the ladies.
  
• I am jealous of guys with a six pack. Or an eight pack. I'm not quite so jealous of any woman with a six/an eight pack. It doesn't hurt to have visible abs without tensing or abs that only appear after showering/exercise or those that only appear under halogen lights at an angle. It also gets the ladies.
  
• I am jealous of tall guys. It doesn't hurt to be tall, like 6 foot 6. I just wish I was 6 foot. It feels bad to be only 5 foot 8. I want to hit 6 foot. Then I could easily touch the rim. I'm only 4 inches or so off. This usually gets the ladies.
  
• I am jealous of guys with high vertical leaps. Long story short, it doesn't hurt to be able to dunk. For some reason, THIS doesn't get the ladies but you can impress everybody 'cos they'll be like: "ZOMGOSH AN ASIAN DUNKS!"
• I am jealous of guys who are multilingual. And of women who are multilingual. Being multilingual is a skill for LIFE. Seriously, this is so useful. Knowing more languages doesn't hurt, in fact, it helps in EVERYTHING. Also, it gets a lot of ladies.
  

There's probably more, but I've either forgotten them/don't wish to disclose them. I also don't know why I put "gets the ladies" or something along those lines at the end of each dot. It just seems to be a recurring theme.

Also, hey. This is my 50th post. Woot! Milestone. /me is unimpressed. I would say leave a comment about your Petty Pangs of Jealousy but nobody seems to leave a comment anyway.